Many families feel uncertain about hosting an au pair, worrying it might disrupt the household’s harmony. However, au pairs often bring positive changes: they provide children with extra attention and care, while families appreciate the added support in daily routines. The presence of an au pair can enrich family interactions, reduce stress, and foster a more organized environment, ultimately enhancing the family dynamic.

Here are five ways that hosting an au pair can enhance your family dynamic.

1. An au pair schedule keeps the family on track

Your au pair will need a schedule that defines work hours for the week. It’s a simple tool, but a schedule can also work to keep everyone in the family on track. While it might seem like you are simply defining work hours for your au pair, what you are really doing is providing a framework for the whole family.

• You will find a handy template in the Family Handbook from AuPairWorld. It’s useful for outlining a base schedule for your au pair, where you set out what a typical week will look like. From there each week might look a little different and require different hours depending on commitments. 

Putting your family’s key commitments down on paper along with your au pair’s work hours is going help you and your family stay organised. 

2. Explaining family rules clarifies expectations

Explaining your family’s rules is fundamental in helping your au pair to supervise your children. Can the kids watch TV after school? Is your toddler allowed to eat candy? It’s fairly obvious that your au pair needs to know the boundaries so that he or she can act appropriately and with authority. But it goes further than that. Knowing the boundaries is also going to help your kids behave appropriately. 

When we define rules together as a family in connection with a successful au pair stay, everybody knows what to expect, and all family members are more likely to follow the rules that have been made.

• The AuPairWorld Family Handbook includes a section where you can explain your family’s rules at home and outside the house. 

• Clear rules help everyone understand what’s acceptable. When expectations are shared openly with both family members and your au pair, you’ll have stronger support in maintaining your standards.

3. Children learn from older role models 

Au pairs make great role models. Your au pair will be living with you and often eating meals with you, and this provides a lot of opportunities for role modelling. When you have found the right au pair, you could think of an au pair as an older brother or sister for your children. There are plenty of daily activities that offer a chance for your children to see how others behave.

Perhaps you’ve asked your kids a million times to put their plates in the dishwasher with no success. Seeing someone else like an au pair actually do this can be a great incentive for kids to get on board. Children love to copy older role models. Taking their plates to the kitchen after dinner will seem obvious to your children when they see an older role model setting that example. And improved behaviour helps everyone to get along better. 

4. Another perspective can enhance understanding

As parents we want to know that our children are doing well. We can find out a certain amount about how our children are developing from teachers or childcare providers, but an au pair is going to give even more insight. Your children and au pair see each other every day and will get to know each other much better than someone like a teacher who is supervising many children at the same time. 

• As your au pair is living under your roof, there will naturally be lots of opportunities for him or her to share updates with you. That perspective is a helpful way to enhance your understanding of your children and to know better what’s going on in their world. 

5. More help means more quality family time

When you invite an au pair into your home, you provide board and pocket money in exchange for their help. Picking up the children after school, organising a snack for the kids, getting the little ones ready for bed… Each family’s needs will be different.

• Finally, having more help around the house means more quality time for you as a family. Having the support of an au pair can go a long way in getting things done at home, leaving you with more time to enjoy as a family together.